Friday, September 12, 2008

Thoughts Sidle

It's Uruguay. I've decided to head toward Uruguay.

The air is pretty clean and clear in western Uruguay. Even Montevideo has pretty good air quality for a capital city. I know an interesting hot water resort area in the country. Not much possibility for river, lake, or canal travel, but two out of three seems good. (see earlier post)

There are good places to visit or stay that are less expensive than Uruguay, but I believe Uruguay is cheaper than, say, Mexico these days. It is not as exotic as Mexico, but it has its attractions. One might call it the Belgium of South America. Also Porto Alegre, Brazil and B.A., Argentina are not far. Uruguay's athletes play ball with the big boys, but it is a small country.

Just because I am heading toward Uruguay is no assurance that I will arrive. I intend to travel slowly so as to give myself abundant opportunity to be distracted.

My first day of travel as I leave 29 may be my most strenuous, but it will be slow: I'll get a bus in 29 and take it to Yucca Valley. From Yucca Valley I'll take a 2nd bus to Palm Springs. In Palm Springs I hope to transfer to a bus that will take me to Indio.
With luck, in Indio, I'll be able to catch a Greyhound to the Mexican border at Calexico.
I have taken the above route, leaving 29 in the Morning and arriving in Mexico City early the next morning. I probably won't try that this time. Instead I will probably spend the night in Calexico or across the border in Mexicali. Then in the morning take a Mexican bus directly to the Tijuana airport and take the first reasonable flight to Ciudad Mexico.

Might stay two or three nights in the Mexican capital. From Mexico I can catch a flight to, say, Panama or Venezuela and on to Brazil. Could take one of the wonderful luxury buses from Brazil to Uruguay.

I can enjoy Montevideo for a week or so and then head for the"termales." There I'll spend much of my time in trunks and bathrobe. I intend to sip mate and eat well too.

But who can say; I might find a lovely villa in the highlands of Panama. I might decide to take some Spanish classes in Merida, Venezuela. Or I might meet a woman of that great Japanese-Portuguese mix in Sau Paulo. Met a girl like that in California many years ago and still have occasional dreams. Then again, I might meet an elegant German-Brazilian matron in Porto Alegre. Women do seem to appear in my dreams.

Its' a trip!

Thoughts of the Adriatic and the Black Sea do sidle into my imagination, but I intend to move my body toward southeast South America.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

When Will I Know I"m "There?"

Further consideration of the how of this trip may be called for as well as for the why of it.
How includes conditions, right? I have already written a bit about conditions. For example: flights are to be of less than 10 hours; bus trips less than 5; there must be plenty of sleep and rest. Now I add some conditions: good companionship; good conversation; play in water, travel on water.
It's a lot for me to keep in mind. I hope you find some use for this discussion.

What may I say about the why of this trip?
Why? to:

  • get out of town

  • get out of the house

  • get newness and variety I have craved

  • experience discovery

  • experience exploration

  • experience fun and joy

  • experience love and compassion

  • go where this man has never gone before

  • look for a home (?)

  • be energized

  • urge myself to greater alertness and awareness

  • get into pleasant hot water

  • go one step beyond the step beyond

  • be where the air is pure

  • travel on water in sight of the shore

  • enjoy a hot mineral water spa

  • play in and on the water

  • learn a language

  • come to better understand a culture other than my own

There are others, but these come directly to mind.

Which of the items above seem most specific to a particular trip or destination? Most of them could be accomplished on any trip. Many can be done at home. The items most useful in selecting a destination are the destination specific. It's beginning to seem easy and simple. Those most destination specific are:

1. travel on water in sight of shore

2. enjoy a hot mineral water spa

3. be where the air is most pure

So, an ideal destination would include one or more of the three enumerated. There are hot water health spas not far from the Danube. I wonder it there is any very clean air along its length.

It seems I do have reasons to travel and some idea of what constitutes an attractive destination.

There are others,but these come immediately to mind

Which of these whys are most specific to a specific trip. Most of the the whys above I could accomplish on any trip. Most of them I can do at home. I'll note the items which seem particular to more specific trips or destinations: travel on or by water where the

Why: The Trip

My wise and kindly friend, Eleanor, recently suggested that I could benefit by considering the why of the trip. I've made an attempt to avoid her suggestion, but with less than complete success. I do usually hear what I've been told. I also forget.

I have forgotten the order of the journalistic questions (Eleanor has been a journalist as well as a poetess {a poetess is only a bit less than a poet}) of how, what, when, where, why, but have found them useful. For example:
The how of my intended travel seems easy. Choosing between ship or plane, horse or ox, Master Card or Visa seems easy (now)
The what can be well answered with 'travel' or 'a trip'
The when may be answered with 'soon'
The where has begun to seem impossible to answer. This morning I awoke ready to reserve a flight to Panama. There I could think. From there it is easy to get to Trinidad, Venezuela, Brazil, Argentina, Colombia, or Samoa. I could get a slow boat to South Africa. Now this afternoon I have changed. I'm learning to spell Seoul correctly and am thinking of Seattle and the great circle route. Where is opaque to me.
Why is a bit clearer. Ah, motive! I can certainly rationalize motive. I may even approach a truer more precise reason for this proposed 'walk about.'

Of course I could grow bored with it all. Have you ever thought an idea to death? I could just decide to stay here and observe the round tails until I discover how the open the bitter gourds.


Why are we not trying to better understand the nature of our part in "nine-eleven?"

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Am I Embarrassed

Am I embarrassed when I ask for a comment and don't get one?

Yes, I am.

I am also left wanting.

But I'd rather you didn't comment then to ignore me completely.

Which do you think is the very

  • worst of my posts?

  • best of my posts?

use "comments" for response

I am:

  • willing to consider what the next best step in my life is.
  • willing to identify a source of resentment, fear, sadness or resentment in my life.
  • willing to keep an eye on the good, better, and best.
  • willing to describe why a situation or condition is of concern to me.
  • ready to learn to become more aware of the limits of my power within the situation.
  • ready and willing to learn to remember how I have dealt with or tried to deal with a similar situation.
  • willing to count my my resources and my sources of help, including the best within me.
  • willing to remember the healing powers working within me and around me.
  • willing to consider the nature of a healing I have seen or experienced.
  • ready, willing, and able to be more honest with myself.
  • willing to accept the reality of health and wholesome wholeness.
  • ready to practice knowing that there is help available to me.
  • ready and willing to practice availing myself of that help.
  • willing to know myself better.
  • ready to learn to know more about myself.
  • ready, and willing to learn to know the kinds of problems I have tended to have.
  • ready, willing, and able to begin to describe a problem I still have.
  • willing to consider a character trait of mine.
  • ready to learn to consider a shortcoming of mine.
  • willing to reconsider the nature of my motive.
  • ready willing and able to practice admitting a wrong of mine no matter its source.
  • willing to take appropriate pride in a better character trait of mine.
  • willing to better know how to right a wrong.
  • good for me.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Is it Serious?

Lives there a woman who suffered violence as a little girl?
Can it be that she does not know the nature of that violence?
Is it possible that, that happening is effecting her life today?

Is it valuable to be able to articulate ones feelings?
Is it valuable to be able to formulate ones resentments?
Is it valuable to experience ones rage?
How did anger get here?

What does it mean to get through ones trauma?
What might it mean to discover ones true feelings?

What have you paid to get your bit of life?

What does it mean to trust the rightness of life?
Does the baby trust in the rightness of life?

When may loneliness begin?
Who has been responsive to your signals?
Who has noted your pain?

Does a baby benefit by being held and moved about?
How is your need for touch satisfied?

Is there a feeling of abandonment?
How is it expressed?
Have you heard a baby express it?

Can it be true that nature does not make clear signals that someone is being tortured unless it is the case?
Is it precisely as serious as it sounds.


If you are an America, as I am.
If you believe that we still have a republic, as I do.
If you believe that we have had pretensions to democracy, as I do.
Then, can you think of any way we can reasonably claim that we are not terrorists?

Travel Decision

This travel decision has turned out to be a greater challenge than I expected.
Once, when we were children, I informed my sister that I had a headache, she, showing a fine grasp on the situation, responded, "Oh, Richard, it's all in your head." It is all in my head and uncomfortable.

There are some facts to go on:
1. I want to get "on the road" now. Very few preparations remain, if one discounts reservations, tickets, visas, and the like.
2. I can afford to spend only about $60 a day or $1800 a month at home or abroad.
3. I know I can travel and live comfortably enough in most of the world within that price-range.
4. I know that there are parts of the world in which I cannot travel comfortably within that price-range. Those parts include Japan, Western Europe, and the good old U.S. of A.
5. I manage to live well enough here at Camp Thunderbird on my available $1800 and put aside a bit!
6. Keeping to a pre-arranged itinerary is neither easy nor satisfying for me.

Some other points of information are:
1. Kevin, a friend who knows Thailand, would like to meet me there in October. Great!
2. My sister, Gerry, has offered to put me in contact with a relative in Norway who is a historian interested in our family history. Great!
3. Rex, a good friend whose birthday is close to mine has invited me to stay at his place for a week in mid-month ant the time of his birthday. No gift expected and we'd be able to explore a bit of the State of Mississippi. Great!
4. Top travel "destinations" of the moment include: China, Germany, Colombia, Sweden, Uruguay, Switzerland, and Japan.
5. I'm thinking that traveling around Us for a time briefly touching base with family and friends in about 10 locations. I wonder what my brother, Dorian, is doing.
6. I want to travel more restfully, in shorter hops, with more companionship than I have in recent years.

Can I do it all? Can I start?
Yes, it is all about me.

Sunday, September 07, 2008


I seems I used to enjoy my travel with a kind of good old "I don't' give a damn!" attitude or a "Damn the torpedoes and full speed ahead!" attitude. It was my 'thought.'
Now I am more concerned with 'true motives,' even though I'm not sure what they are.

I've just been practicing some conscious inner dialoguing. Inner dialoguing is fairly new to me. I used to want to talk things out with others. The less sure I was of what those 'things' were, the more I wanted to talk them out; usually. I still like to talk things out. But I've noticed that others are not always interested in all of my problems. They seem most uninterested I discussing those problems I had yet tried to identify. In fact, I didn't want to talk to myself about them.

You have thoughts about talking to ones self? So did my father. He said talking to oneself was fine and often useful. He did say that it should be kept within certain limits. He said that it was okay to talk aloud; that it was eve okay to answer oneself. He did caution me to take special note when I caught myself saying "Huh?" in these conversations.

Now, I have been doing a pretty good job of taking care of business, of myself, and, on occasion, of others, for well over half a century. Even so, a guy can still learn.
Just now, during a little inner dialoguing, I think I discovered some motivation for my lack of travel decisiveness.
Maybe it's better to say I discovered obstructions to decision or obstructing motives. Anyway, I discovered that incompletely acknowledged fear of spending too much money might have been slowing my decision a bit. However, other motives loomed larger. More fear. It seems that I have feared that I will drive too far, too long and too much. I feared that too much driving would lead to too little fun and too much fatigue. I have feared that I would spend too much time on buses and so expose myself to pain, fatigue, and boredom. I have unconsciously feared that I would book unpleasantly long flights. Excellent earphones, great movies and decent food, even in business class do make long hours in the air fun. In the recent decade my ankles swell. I once thought it good to have swell ankles. It's a minor fear, but I was also reminded that long layovers at airports are downers for me.

My dialogue led me to identify some problems and potential problems. What is an early step to solving a problem?
Now I am saying, mostly to myself:
I am willing to arrange to drive less than five hours in a day.
I am wiling to arrange to travel less than five ours on a bus. )An exception might be on one of those wonderful buses found in southeastern South America which provide completely horizontal full length sleeping accommodations with good fresh coffee in the morning.)
I am willing to plan to avoid any flight of more than 9 hours. (that doesn't provide the sleeping accommodations of those excellent SA buses)
I am willing to avoid airport layovers of more than two hours. I'll be very open to taking a hotel and enjoying the city and country of that layover so as to spend less than two hours that airport.

I think that this talking out has been a help.

Travel Decisions?

These travel decisions are not easy.
My '97 Astro Van is still in pretty good shape It's in the garage now being kept in 800 $ good shape. I can sleep in it. I put a futon mattress on the floor. On a driving trip I'll sleep in it about half the time. I imagine that each night in the Van adds 50 + $ to the gas budget. It is also my escape from a noisy motel or hotel.

So, I could start this trip in the Astro. I probably would not drive it to Finland or Turkey.

What I have done is start driving and then sell the vehicle at the shore or airport to be rid of an encumbrance and to finance my onward journey. I've sold two vehicles in Miami and one in Tegucigalpa.

Maybe someone going 'my way' would drive. Loves come and go. My love of driving is going.

I suspect that a lot of the Astro comes from Japan. Maybe I could drive it there. Driving to Japan may nor be a good idea, but going to Japan sounds very good at the moment. Just watched and old movie about American baseball players in Japan. I don't play baseball, but I can see myself at a quiet country inn with easy access to a hot water spa. I see myself eating wit a fork.

I still have not decided in which direction, or to which destination I will turn my first step. I am putting obstacles in my own way. I am a bit farther from transportation centers here, than others are elsewhere. Which thought suggests that I am feeling sorry for myself for the slight added difficulty and expense of beginning a trip from here. My goodness. Weaknesses and fears of age and fixed income are raising their ugly heads.

I have begun to put a few things in a suitcase.

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